I looked out the window and seen his bald head
I ran to the fridge and pulled out an egg
Scoped him with my scopes he had no hair
Launched that shot and he was caught out there
Saw the convertible driving by
Loaded up the slingshot and let one fly
He went for his to find he didn’t have one
Put him in check correct with my egg gun
The egg a symbol of life
Go inside your house and bust out your wife
Pulled out the jammy he thought it was a joke
The trigger I pulled his face the yoke
Reached in his pocket took all his cash
Left my man standing with an egg moustache
Suckers they come a dime a dozen
And when I say dozen you know what I’m talking about
Humpty Dumpty was a big fat egg
He was playing the wall and then he broke his leg
Tossed it out the window three minutes hot
Hit the Rastaman he said *bloodclot*
Which came first the chicken or the egg
I egged the chicken then I ate his leg
Riding the trains in between cars
When I pull out the station *you’re gonna get yours*
Drive by eggings plaguing L.A.
*Yo they just got my little cousin ese*
Sometimes hard boiled sometimes runny
It comes from a chicken not a bunny dummy
People laugh it’s no joke
My name’s Yauch and I’m throwing the yoke
*Now they got me in a cell* but I don’t care
It was then that I caught catching people out there
We all dressed in black we snuck up around the back
We began to attack the eggs did crack on Haze’s back
Sam I am down with the program
Green eggs and ham Yosemite Sam
Come Halloween you know I come strapped
I throw it at a sucker K-pap
You made the mistake you judge a man by his race
You go through life with egg on your face
You woke up in the morning with a peculiar feeling
You looked up and saw egg dripping from the ceiling
Families puck rocks the businessman
I’ll dog anybody with an egg in my hand
Not like the crack that you put in a pipe
But crack on your forehead here’s a towel now wipe
Eggman
Posted in Beastie Boys.